Seven and a half candles

I am relieved my family didn't try to put seventy-four candles on the birthday cake - I no longer have the puff for that.
It was a good party, though. After a day when I received visits from friends and neighbours, and several phonecalls, emails and facebook messages, we sat down for a celebratory meal of köfte and basmati rice, followed by cake with candles.
Best of all was the singing of Happy Birthday - Jeremy and Jackie and the three boys, Joe, Matthew and little Alfie, and on the phone from San Diego, Sarah and the munchkins, Sophie, Kiki and Harry. And my lovely friend "Angit" was with us too.
If this is what birthdays are like, I am going to have one every year from now on.

Parable

It is important for grandparents to do what they can to help build up the character and moral rectitude of their grandchildren, without, of course, usurping the role of parents. Thus it was that I had occasion to talk to my grandsons about truth and lies, using, in the best parable tradition, the story of George Washington. You know the one: George's father discovered that his favourite cherry tree had been cut down. He confronted his son and asked him:
"Do you know what happened to my cherry tree? Someone has chopped it down."
The boy looked into his father's eyes, and knew that this was an important moment in his life.
"Father," he said, "I cannot tell a lie." He paused. "A big boy did it and ran away."
Character building, that's what it's all about.

Trellis the Good

Such a caring lady, our correspondent from the Principality:
Dear Mrs Scrote, she writes, you're not going to believe this, but Myfanwy Roberts - you know, the one with the warts - well, I hear she's getting married! Yes, her! And she's not even pregnant as far as I can tell. Some people are all swank, know what I mean?
Hope you are well, dear. Let me know if you need any more incontinence pants.
Love
Blodwen Trellis, Mrs, Widow, retd.

Rick K and the Allnighters

I had to go and lie down in a darkened room after watching this. Whatever he's on, I wish he'd send me a supply: I need something zingy to get me through the next few days!

Californian Spring

Once again the Ceanothus (Californian Lilac) in the front garden has been a show. Next to it, against the garage wall is a Pyrocantha, which seems to be more vigorous than ever before. I am hoping for a good crop of red berrries in the autumn. At the back of the house, the Guelder Rose (Viburnum opulus) is a mass of white flowers, and should produce a crop of succulent red berries as well. Is this the year Waxwings finally show up in my garden? Wenn nur!

St Boniface of Crediton

Of course you know Boniface! His feast day is June the Fifth, the same day as my birthday! (Steady on, Allsop, that's two exclamation marks already! No, three! No, ...)
He was born in 675 and was christened Wynfrith, but is always known as Boniface. I was christened Jack, but am always known as Old Scrote.
Among his many achievements was the compilation of the first Latin grammar written in English. One of my few achievements was the publication of my Student's Grammar of English.
He left England to go to convert the heathen tribes of Germany, and was finally murdered, put to the sword by Friesian barbarians. The nearest I got to emulating Boniface in this respect was trying to teach English to assorted German-speaking students. As to the manner of my death, I would prefer to be shot by a jealous husband on my ninety-fifth birthday.
All of this is a way of letting you know that it is my birthday on Saturday, just in case you want to propose me for canonisation, or whatever.

N-dubz

In the course of a heated discussion on Cambirds, someone made reference to "N-dubz". I had no idea what that meant, and neither did another member of the group, P. I love the exchanges which followed. First a query from P:
Sent: 01 June 2010 16:55 To: cambirds@yahoogroups.com From P: "I have had a long think and I know I am ignorant but what please are or is N-dubz?"
Then, a reply from S.
To P, From S: "Ashamed to say I know, but N-dubz are a rap (music) band. You know the type,they sound like a combination of someone building a shed whilst nailing their feet to the floor, and a steam hammer. So you can practice, just say these words in quick succession whilst wearing a baseball hat backwards - you'll soon see what I mean: "ooh, ah, chi, chi,wolla, wolla, bang, crash, f***, wow, bang, init, crash, woop, crash, ting.""
I thank the Dear that I have never heard this group, and, with luck, never will.