Thursday, February 11, 2010

Grumpy? But it's Thursday!

OK, guys, I know I said I only did grumpiness on Fridays, so that I can give myself (and anyone within earshot) six serene days in each week. But today (Thursday) is proving bizarre.
Let me lay this one on you: I called the local surgery to make an appointment with my doctor, for Monday preferably. I got the reply: "We can only make the first three appointments on Monday, you will need to come to the surgery at 0830 on Monday to make an appointment." Weird or what?
Try this one: I needed to send flowers to someone in hospital, so I called the hospital switchboard just to confirm the address and the name of the ward. I got the response "We don't allow flowers any more." What's THAT about?
I once tried to organise a visit for some of my students to a refinery in Southampton. "Sorry," says the spokespsn, "We are fully booked for the next two years". "No matter," says I, "Book us in for the first date after the two years." "Sorry," says the spokespsn, "We can't make bookings more than two years ahead."
My brain hurts.
Years ago, I and a friend came up with an amazing (to us) hypothesis to account for all the mismatches and crossed wires that blight our lives: we are all the victims of a cosmic cockup - WE ARE ON THE WRONG PLANET. If we are right, it's hard luck on whoever should be on this planet, because they are probably having just as rotten a time as we are exiled here.
And now, let us return to serenity.
Oh merde, it's snowing again.......

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