I was moved by Mrs Trellis's belated but most welcome birthday greeting.
Dear Jeremy Paxman, she writes, I had not intended to wish you a happy birthday, you being such a crabby person and all, but I was moved by your description of how you wept at your birthday party. It just shows that one should not judge a crab by its shell.
I find that these days I prefer not to think about birthdays, as they are a reminder of what the late Mr Trellis used to refer to as "the passage of anus domini". Bless him, Greek was not his best subject at school.
Anyway, despite everything, a Happy Birthday to you, and please try not to be so unpleasant in future, although it's probably not your fault: I am sure proper bowel movements would make all the difference to you.
Yours
Blodwen Trellis, etc
No comments:
Post a Comment