I don't think I am old and crabby. At least, I hope I am not old and crabby. But do you know what makes people old and crabby? One of the things that makes people old and crabby is that nobody touches them.
For nine weeks, I had constant and wonderful touching: cuddles from my grandchildren, hugs from my daughter, even the occasional happy embrace from Bruninha, the Brazilian nanny.
Since I came back, which is nearly four weeks now, literally nobody has touched me, apart from a most welcome handshake from my old mate, Roger B, who came to stay for the weekend..
Not being touched is not healthy. I have thought about going into my local supermarket, Tesco's in Ely, and putting a sign round my neck saying "Anybody fancy a cuddle?", but I have a feeling that I will be misunderstood, arrested and thrown into the chokey.
You know, I think the English are not good at touching each other, which is why they all have dogs and cats.
Well, if all I can expect here is an occasional desultory lick from a cocker spaniel, the sooner I get back to San Diego, the better.
Is anyone out there on my wavelength on this?
3 comments:
Oh, my. When I was an animal control officer, who had to respond house-to-house for complaints, many of the people who had called were elderly. The women in particular would reach up and grip my shirt front, hoisting themselves a little higher so they could see my face better. I often put my arms around them. I regretted it with one needy animal hoarder, since I came away with a bosom of shit.
But one of the very best characteristics of my long-ago husband was that if I went to him and asked to be held, he never minded stopping whatever he was doing and put his arms around me. No rocking, no humming, just big strong enveloping arms for as long as I needed. Ecstasy.
Prairie Mary
When my stepmother was in her last year, and I visited her in various hospitals and nursing homes, I often had the same thought. That must be one of the worse things about aging, but no one talks about it much.
Mary, what a blessed man your husband was. I can see why you cherish his memory.
Charles, you are right, but the awful thing is that the aged can actually resent and resist physical contact because they have got so out of the habit.
I haven't got out of the habit yet, and open to offers....
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