Guido, che ti bruci la barba!

All over Brtain, bons are on fire, rockets are crackling into the sky, potatoes are roasting in the embers, and little boys are burning their bums in the heat. And it's all to one end: we are burning a Catholic.
When I was a sprog, it was called Guy Fawkes Night, November the Fifth, to celebrate the capture of Fawkes and his fellow Catholic conspirators, whose plans to blow up the Houses of Parliament were foiled by the MI5 spooks of the day.
But, alas, no longer. It is no longer politically correct to burn Catholics. Fair enough. But it is no longer politically correct even to remember the event.
No big deal, you might think. As long as the lads have a chance to let off their bangers. But you would be wrong. Because, hot on the heels of suppressing the GF aspect of November 5, the PC gestapo are now advocating the de-christianising of Christmas, on the grounds that it might "offend other religious groups".
Let me state here and now that I am not offended by Ramadhan, Seder, Yom Kippur or the Hindu festivals of (supply the names), so please, guys, don't be offended if I celebrate the birth of Jesus in the stable at Bethlehem, etc, even if I am, at the time, full of turkey and not sober enough to give it its due solemnity.