A fitting epitaph

Hands up all of you who are adult, but very short and very slim. Or very short. but fat. Or very tall but very skinny. Or very tall and fat.
Well, that probably accounts for 80% of the population.
But have you noticed that the High Street retailers only cater for some notional middle-of-the-road Mr/Ms average? Some mannequin/mannequine, who, through some freak of nature, can ALWAYS find something that fits?!
So, what do we other freaks do? We go to the specialist dealers, in my case, the "Big Man" shops. I am 6'4", waist 46, inside leg 33". And what do I find? Waists from 40 to 60 and more, but all inside leg measurements are either "regular" or "long", where "long" is defined as 31". I admire women, but when it comes to getting clad, I think you ladies have an even worse time than I do. Let's push this one a bit further. Have you noticed that, even if you find something that fits your outrageous shape, it's basically cheap-looking and ugly? 80% of the human race DOOMED? There ought to be a law.........
Years ago, I thought if I ever decided to commit suicide, before I did so, I would buy a gun and shoot certain people that I thought the world would be better off without. But as I have grown older, the number of people I would happily shoot has grown to such a proportion that I have had to give up that ambition.
And all I want. for god's sake, is a pair of trousers, 46 waist, 33 inside leg. I don't even give a flying f...k about material or colour, just as long as they fit my arse and cover my ankles.