I don't wish to bore you, and I don't wish to make a scene, but I am having a real problem with a Mrs Trellis of North Wales. I don't know why she has attached herself to me, given that she is originally Humphrey Lyttleton's friend, but I guess there isn't a lot else to do in North Wales.Dear readers, I would welcome your advice on how to respond to her latest letter to me:
Dear Oprah Winfrey, I don't think you should worry about lower black pain. After all, it's only like a strong suntan, isn't it? I once got suntanned in Llandudno, so I know what it is like. Well, more sunburned really. Also I think you are much prettier than Condomleeza Rice. Do you think you could accept me as a contestant on your TV show, The Weakest Link? I know quite a lot of things, specially about crossstitch and flower arranging.
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