Moving on swiftly....

The General Synod of the Church of England now has a pro-active policy on the environment, and the Diocese in which I live has a specific policy to encourage the provision of nesting sites for swifts. This is clearly a good climate for us in Action for Swifts. All the same, if you want to put a "louvre" nestbox for swifts in a church belfry (the kind of box that gives them nesting accommodation but does not allow them to enter the belfry itself), you need the approval of the Churchwarden, who is responsible for the fabric of the building; and the Bell Captain, who is responsible for the bells. Although you don't need it, it is clearly a good idea to get the blessing of the Vicar as well.
We now have a number of churches in Cambridgeshire with louvre boxes. Hurrah. But in the case of the church at S.... we have the approval of the Churchwarden and the Bell Captain, and the support of the village Conservation Society to boot, but the Vicar says he does not want swift nestboxes in his belfry.
I have had a word with God, who understandably has turned down my request to strike the Vicar dead - I know I was a little hasty - so I am now casting round for some other means of removing the blockage. Goodness knows what the Vicar's reasoning is. Maybe he already has bats in the belfry, if you catch my drift.
Anyway, if you hear that the Vicarage in the parish of S... has been burnt down, with the Vicar in it, just put it down to one of those freakish happenstances that sometimes occur.